Women Talk is a monthly conversation between a member of Women Photograph and Kerry Manders. This month meet Laurence Philomène — a Canadian photographer based in Montreal. Laurence is also a member of the 2020 Women Photograph Mentorship class.

Bio. Offer us a short, snappy (not-copied-from-your-website or any publication), fun biography. Who are you?

Last year a coach told me I am expression, catalyst, peace, wisdom, fortitude. I have been a photographer for a little over ten years and professionally for about five. I am a chronically ill, non I binary/trans, millennial person, and most of the work I make revolves around those themes. I am interested in humanizing aspects of identity (queerness, transness, illness) that have been historically marginalized. Visually, I make colourful work that explores femininity, masculinity, and how the two can co-exist outside of binary understandings of gender. I also have a fascination with studying the passage of time through long-form documentation of myself and my loved ones.

In true queer fashion I will also tell you my astrological sign: gemini sun, gemini mood & gemini rising.

Being. What are you working on now? Where? How? Why?

At the moment, I am working on a year-long, self-portrait project entitled “Puberty.” This work is about burnout, letting myself feel vulnerable, humanizing trans existence, and celebrating the beauty in mundane daily moments.

I’d been toying with the idea of documenting my transition for a while. I started taking testosterone in April 2018. Witnessing these changes within myself is an interesting challenge as a self-portrait photographer. They are subtle changes. You think it’s going to happen overnight but it doesn’t. This is what I’m learning: everything takes longer than I think it’s going to take.

So this is going on in my mind, the puzzle of how do I document this fleeting moment in time. Meanwhile, I’m burned out. I’m 25 and I’ve completely zapped every ounce of energy out of my body. For a long time, I tell myself I need to take a break – but the internet does not take a break. It just keeps happening. Over and over and over. Every day: new pictures, new content to produce, new opportunities to miss out on. Thinking about productivity culture and hating it so much, yet feeling I cannot escape it. It became inevitable: I put myself on a forced sabbatical. I didn’t know how long this would last … three weeks went by. I listened to a lot of meditation podcasts. Then the boredom started to set in. I day dreamed long-term documentary projects. I thought about photography as sociology. The decision to document myself in that context seemed obvious, and I decided to challenge myself to create daily self-portraits without putting pressure on myself for them to be masterpieces: to just document my life as it is.

Puberty, Paint Me Like One of Your Pre-Raphaelite Boy-Girls, 2019

The images are at times staged: studio portraits documenting changes in my body (facial hair, muscle tissue, etc.) with a straightforward approach. Other times the images are candid: setting up a tripod in my home as I go about my daily routines (eating breakfast, doing my dishes, waking up, playing dress up at a friend’s house, injecting testosterone, scrolling social media on my phone).

My work is very intimate and typically only involves me, my camera, and a tripod. This process involves taking pictures with a remote repeatedly until I almost forget the camera is there.

With this project, I want to show [a] trans life outside of the spotlight: depicting day-to-day, human moments. Through these daily scenes, I also look at transition as a slow and at times lonely process in a society where trans lives are marginalized. The images are cinematic, offering the viewer a glimpse into intimate scenes of my life, and creating a primary source document on a trans life in the 21st century. Too often, transgender bodies are depicted through the lenses of cis-gendered artists. As a trans artist, I want to shift that dynamic by turning my lens inward and creating imagery rooted in (self) care. I also want to show that trans people who do not fit neatly within the gender binary exist. We are here, and we are thriving.

Borrowing. Tell us a little about your artistic lineage. Who are the artists and/or works that influence you? Who or what inspires you and why?

The first exhibit I saw that really made an impact on me was a huge Annette Messager retrospective at Centre Pompidou. She is not a “photographer” per se but often uses photography as a tool in her practice. I really loved how obsessive she seemed to be with her art making, and the autobiographical/therapeutic aspects of it. Later on, as a teen, I’d go to the photography section of the library downtown Montreal after school. I was obsessed with Wolfgang Tillmans’ book Truth Study Center. It was the first time I saw really raw queer art, and I really enjoyed his use of daylight and what felt like candid still lives. In college, I got into Bettina Rheims’ monograph Modern Lovers, 1990 book for which she photographed gender-non-conforming youth in Paris and London. I was also quite taken with Nan Goldin and the vulnerability she displayed in making her life story art in itself. I wouldn’t say these are my main inspirations nowadays but they were very instrumental in getting me to think about my own directions.

Parallel to my library visits, most of my photo education came from a community of like-minded young photographers. I was a part of Flickr (followed by Tumblr) circa 2007-2011. This was before the internet was a space to “brand” yourself, and it felt like a genuine space where we could offer each other constructive criticism, where we could make and share art for the hell of it. I also co-founded an online feminist art collective, The Coven, that was active from ~2012 to 2017; it was a big part of my formative years.

Blown-away. Show us an image by you that takes your breath away. What makes this image great?

This is one of my favorite images from my ongoing self-portrait project. It feels like the most honest self-portrait I’ve shot, which is what I like about it, and what I strive for in everything I do. I shot it immediately after waking up, setting up my tripod, and going back to lie on my bed. I am not a morning person, and I think you can see that here. I have to physically drag myself out of bed. Being pulled out of my morning dreams always leaves me feeling heavy and foggy. I like my cat popping up in the corner, the mismatched socks, and the mess on the floor. This image is about seeing the beauty in the mundane which is really what I’m working on these days.

Between. Discuss the relationship between you and your subjects (whether people, objects, land). What is the nature of your relationship with the things you photograph or film?

The work I make is largely autobiographical and I like it to act as a love letter to my community and my loved ones. Before starting any project, I ask myself: what kind of art do I want to see in the world, and, more importantly, what story is mine to tell?

The vast majority of the work I produce is imagery of me and people close to me (my best friends, partners, long-term collaborators). I love photographing the same people and places year after year and, through that practice, looking at identity as ever-shifting, evolving, Never static.

It also came to my attention recently that a lot of my images are about homemaking, and creating a feeling of safety. My daily self-portraits are shot in my home, and my studio is located in what used to be my childhood bedroom – so there’s an immediate intimacy when I photograph people in that setting.

Non-Binary Portraits, No Girls No Boys No Nothin’, 2017

Better. How do you work towards continuous improvement, on honing your craft?

What excites me with photography is that the possibilities are endless: literally anything can be a photo project, and with a camera in hand, I can never truly be bored or alone. I let my mind wander with no set destination. In more practical terms, I make myself photograph something every day, rain or shine, with no pressure beyond the act of photographing. It’s helped a lot and most of my favorite images are created that way.

Bolster. Whose work do you think deserves a shout-out here, and why? Who haven’t I been hearing about and whose website I should check out immediately?

This is the part of the interview where I give a shout out to Hobbes Ginsberg, who is my favorite contemporary photographer and someone I consider a long-lost sister. We met in San Fransisco in 2014 through mutual friend Vivian Fu (who is also an amazing, underrated photographer making diary-style autobiographical work and I highly recommend you check her out) and we became fast friends. Hobbes is a fellow a trans artist making colourful self-portrait work – so there’s a connection there, but what interests me about her work is that she is looking at aspects of identity beyond surface-level gender explorations. Her work touches a lot on homemaking, creating spaces for yourself, and mental health. She has a very unique and immediately recognizable vision which is rare these days.

Puberty, Doing My Shot in the Bathroom, 2019

Balance. When you are not photographing, what are you doing that keeps you grounded? What (else) do you do for fun?

A lot of what I do you see in my photographs, because my work is about my life so it definitely becomes tricky to have a solid boundary between the two. I’m a homebody so when I’m not photographing I am usually taking care of my house, snuggling with my sphynx cat and my partner, journaling, and meditating. This year I’ve taken to going on long walks in the alleyways in my neighbourhood: they reveal different stories than the main streets. I also do snack reviews and post those on my private Instagram for friends: I try any new snack I can find and give it a rating out of 10. I’ve reviewed somewhere around 1,000 packaged snacks over the last couple of years. It feels good to have a hobby that’s not monetized and that’s just for fun!

Best. What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever heard? (It doesn’t need to have been given to you personally or be about photography specifically).

I can’t think of the best life advice I’ve been given, but the best career advice I ever got was from a photo agent I had a meeting with early on in my career. He told me that to be a successful commercial photographer. I should always make my personal work a priority, because it is what will distinguish me from other photographers. Ultimately, having a distinct vision is what will get me hired. It’s simple advice but so true.

Puberty, Cake at Nina’s House on My 26th Birthday, 2019

Beyond. Tell us about a future project or challenge that you hope to tackle. (Feel free to answer this question literally or figuratively).

I am working on moving away from a lack mindset and appreciating what I have rather than focusing on what I don’t yet have. I’m acknowledging that everything I need is already there for me, and using gratefulness as a motivator to better myself.

In the photo realm, I’m challenging myself to publish two bodies of work (“Puberty” and “Huldufólk,” a self-portrait project I shot on a residency in Iceland this year) in book-form this coming year.

Laurence Philomène: laurencephilomene.com // @laurencephilomene
Kerry Manders: kerrymanders.com // @kerrymmanders